Thursday, January 11, 2018

Derek and I Got Promise Rings

Last weekend, Derek took me to the mall and bought us promise rings. I knew Derek was, like, nice, but I didn't know he was, like, the one. Derek is the nicest, sweetest boy I've ever known and I love him so much. I wear my promise ring all the time; I never take it off.

Last summer, on our first date, Derek taught me how to shoot his dad's AR-15. We've been dating super seriously for, like, almost five months now, so I think it's almost time. Rebecca said if he puts it in my butt, I don't lose my virginity. I think Rebecca is full of shit and just likes it when Jack puts it in her butt.

Rebecca is an ugly fat cow. I hate her. She is poor. One time I went over to Rebecca's house. It smelled like shit. Rebecca's mom made Weight Watchers beef hotpot microwave meals for dinner. Rebecca's mom doesn't have a job, she just smokes cigarettes and meth all day.

Jack said he loved me. Jack bought me a promise ring. Fucking asshole. I told Jack I wanted to wait until marriage because I want to get into heaven. Jack said I was a prude, and the next day he got with Rebecca, that slut. Fuck Jack. Fuck Rebecca. They can both go fuck each other up the ass.

I don't care that Derek was born without half of his head. I don't care that Derek is deaf or blind or retarded. One day Jack and I will be married and have kids and be one big happy family. Rebecca will be addicted to meth and nicotine like her whore of a mother. Jack will probably be dead from crashing his truck while drunk driving, or maybe he'll overdose on Percocet in the bathroom of a Waffle House.

Maybe if Derek and I don't work out, I can move to New York City. My cousin is a model and lives there and said I could move in with her. I could leave this place and these people behind and have a fresh start in a new place. Nobody would even know who I am. I promise if Derek and I break up then I'm out of here, and I'll become a model, rich and famous, and that's a promise that I can keep.

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